


Cat's Cradle

by Annakovsky



Category: Chrestomanci - Jones
Genre: F/M, Incest, Yuletide, Yuletide 2009
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-21
Updated: 2009-12-21
Packaged: 2017-10-04 20:50:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annakovsky/pseuds/Annakovsky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gwendolen didn't seal herself into her other world as thoroughly as they all thought she did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cat's Cradle

**Author's Note:**

  * For [twitchbell](https://archiveofourown.org/users/twitchbell/gifts).



Cat was very young when Gwendolen escaped into another world and shut herself in. He remembers her in more-or-less disjointed images, as bright and sharp, all fair hair and pointed elbows, terrible and beautiful. When Millie tells them stories about Asheth, Cat pictures her as being something like Gwendolen, somehow.

Every so often, usually in the night, Cat will feel his magic being drained off in that familiar way of hers, so familiar that he usually doesn't notice it until it's been going on for a long time, or until he needs his magic for something else. It goes from him to her along the grooved path in the air Gwendolen had made for it, worn down by years of use, a path that apparently can go even to another world.

At first, when Cat would realize Gwendolen was doing it he would jerk his magic back and away from her, cutting her off, thinking, _No, that's mine, stop that!_ He was glad Gwendolen was gone -- she had tried to have him killed, like he wasn't even a person, much less her own brother. Much less the only family she had left.

But as the years go by and the hurt stops being so immediate, Cat starts feeling more... wistful when he thinks of Gwendolen. Wondering what she's doing in her new world, if she ever thinks about him. Janet might be her double, but she's not really much like Gwendolen at all; most of the time Cat forgets they even look alike. And it's sad and strange, not having anybody left in the world, not really. Sometimes he watches Roger with his family and thinks that it must be nice to still have parents, a real sister.

So the next time Gwendolen tries to pull his magic from him, instead of pulling it back, he follows the thread of it, letting himself drift along with it. He follows it all the way to Gwendolen's world, to see her sitting on a throne, making pronouncements in the lordly way she had. She looks even less like Janet than she used to; she's gotten harder looking, all her angles sharper. But she's still his sister, and the wave of familiarity and homesickness that Cat feels when he sees her is almost overwhelming. He lets go, falling back into his bed with a bump, and lies there awake, missing Gwendolen. He doesn't even bother to take his magic back, just lets her use it until she's done. It tickles, rather, and pulls low in his belly.

**

"So," Marianne Pinhoe says at one of their afternoon lessons in enchanter's magic. "Cat's the only other nine-lived enchanter in the world?"

"That's right," Chrestomanci says.

"So he has to be the next Chrestomanci," Marianne says, like she's trying to get it all straight. "And regulate magic."

"Exactly," Chrestomanci says. "Now, as I was saying...."

"But," Marianne interrupts. "What would happen if Cat turned out to be bad? I mean, not Cat. But what if there was only one other nine-lived enchanter in the world and he was murdering people and, I don't know, being a tyrant? Then who would be Chrestomanci?"

For a second Chrestomanci looks a little distressed, and he darts a quick look at Cat. But it's only for a second before his vague look takes over as usual and he's unreadable again. "Well," he says. "I suppose in that case I should just have to live forever. Now, if we could get back to Magical Theory...."

**

Gwendolen starts pulling harder at his magic almost every night now. Cat finds himself looking forward to it, that tug that reminds him she exists, that they're still connected. A week after he'd followed the magic to see her, he tugs back -- not the sharp tug that stops her using his magic, but a gentle tug, like a signal. Two soft pulls, to let her know he's there. There's a pause after he does, as the magic stops trailing out of him, just stretched tight like a cord between them, and then two tugs come back from Gwendolen.

He wishes he knew Morse Code so he could say something to her, do something more to communicate. But he doesn't, so instead he tries to imagine her lying in her own bed, imagining his magic flowing between them, from his solar plexus to hers. Once he's seen the magic like a cord of light between them, he imagines it drifting around her, wrapping around her wrist to pat her hand, say hello.

The magic lies still for a second, then on his end it starts moving too, complicated motions like a game of string figures, until it wraps firmly around his wrist, tugging him up. It's just like the time before, when he drifted after it, and he lets Gwendolen pull him along, through the strange foggy in-between place until he's moving into Gwendolen's darkened bedroom, her bright hair spread across the pillow.

"Cat," she says as he floats down until he's lying beside her, curled against her side. Seeing Gwendolen again feels like a dream, things happening he doesn't feel quite in control of. "I missed you," she says, putting her hand on his chest, then moving it lower, so she's touching his belly where the magic is coming out of him, feeling its borders with the tips of her fingers. It feels strange.

"You did?" he says. The idea of that makes him feel very warm and small all at once, like he did after their parents died and Gwendolen took care of things, was so motherly to him.

"Yes," Gwendolen says. She's still touching him, one hand on his stomach, hot through his pajamas, as the other hand tangles in his magic. "And look at you. You look so grown up."

"I am grown up, almost," Cat agrees. He's gotten tall, almost as tall as Roger now. And Gwendolen's grown up too, which is strange. She's got a woman's body, breasts under her nightgown, and it makes him feel odd, noticing that. She's his sister but he hasn't seen her since they were children.

He starts feeling very sleepy and content, wrapped up and warm, and he notices drowsily that Gwendolen's wrapped his magic all around him like a blanket or a cocoon, the strands of it comfortingly tight around him. It reminds him of something, but he can't think what. And then she's touching him, under the magic and under his clothes. "That's it, Cat," she murmurs to him. "Good boy." Her hand drifts lower and lower, and he's so warm and happy and held tight, just like... like he can't think what, and she's touching him in private places, and it feels distracting, strange and good. She starts to stroke him, and he's so sleepy, his magic holding his hands still, wrapped around him in a white bundle, just like... like.... _Like a spider and a fly,_ he thinks, just before he falls back asleep.

He wakes up in his own bed, feeling hot and a little ashamed, and wishing he could see Gwendolen again. That's the strangest part.

**

The Family has gotten very boring at meals lately. Granted, the conversation's been less interesting ever since Julia and Roger and Janet went off to university, especially on weekends when Marianne goes home to the village, but this is even worse than usual. Illegal weapons are going missing in Series Ten and for some reason the Family can't track them and misdirection spells and strangely powerful thingummyjigs and so on and so forth, for hours and hours every night. It can't be too important or they'd be asking Cat to help with the problem, but they seem very worried, all tight mouths and lines around their eyes. Chrestomanci is drawn and pale and even more vague than usual, and even Millie is subdued.

Cat mostly lets his mind wander as they talk about it. He seems to be having a hard time focusing lately. His mind keeps drifting to Gwendolen, how he keeps dreaming of her. Perverted, distressing dreams that he never seems to want to wake up from.

As they leave the table, Millie catches hold of his wrist. "Are you feeling quite all right, Cat?" she asks. "You look tired." She's concerned, motherly and comforting in a way that makes Cat a little worried she might somehow intuit why he's so exhausted. He's never very refreshed when he wakes up from his dreams -- from the ones about Gwendolen, anyway.

Cat stifles the yawn he was in the middle of and tries to look alert, not like he was just dazedly thinking of his missing sister.

"Oh, yes, I'm fine," Cat says, and decides that maybe he should avoid Millie in future. Just in case she really can intuit anything. She's a very powerful enchantress in her own right, he reminds himself, and goes up to the library to see if he can find anything there on sibling bonds in magic. But he doesn't have any luck.

**

He starts going to bed earlier and earlier, floating off to Gwendolen as soon as he feels her reaching out for his magic. One day as he floats away, he looks back and sees his own form left in the bed, translucent and faint looking. That's how he knows he's dreaming, that he's really still in his bed.

Gwendolen's always so pleased to see him, pulling him close, making string figures out of his magic in the air for him to watch dreamily. They're such interesting patterns, and Gwendolen tells him how much she wishes he was always there with her, how she'd always keep him safe the way she's doing now. His magic wraps around him like swaddling cloths, and it's so warm and secure, lovely, even if he does wake up feeling drained.

**

In their lesson, Chrestomanci seems as distracted as Cat. He's pale and irritable, which makes for a sarcastic and wholly unpleasant hour. "Do try to pay attention, Eric," Chrestomanci says in that terrifying way of his, when Cat can't seem to explain the theory behind augury. "I can't keep repeating this forever, if only because some day I will no doubt be dead. Possibly of repeating things."

For a second Cat thinks of being sarcastic back, of asking whether Chrestomanci has any plans to die any time soon, but when he looks at Chrestomanci's black eyes he's too frightened to say anything like that. Chrestomanci always makes him feel like shriveling up inside. Instead he decides to try to distract him. "Are you still looking for where those weapons are going?" he asks.

"Yes," Chrestomanci says. He rubs his forehead like he's getting a headache. "And now there are wars going on in half the Related Worlds, all supplied by the same illegal means. And 12I's the only --" But then Chrestomanci breaks off abruptly, giving Cat a strange look. That's the world Gwendolen sealed herself into, 12I. Cat tries to look innocent and politely interested, like he hasn't had any contact with 12I lately. Well, and it's true, because he hasn't really. It's just some strange dreams.

"At any rate," Chrestomanci says after a pause. "I'm taking valuable time out from exhausting and frustrating work on that catastrophe to teach you about augury, so the least you could do is try to concentrate."

"Yes, sir," Cat says, and bends back over his books.

**

It's a relief to go to Gwendolen, where people aren't so tired and irritable all the time. Always so relaxing, to let go, to let Gwendolen take over. He's got that warm, drowsy, happy feeling again, the one he has almost every night when he goes to see her, and she has him all wrapped up in his magic, pressed close against her body, making soothing noises at him. "That's right," she's saying. "I always loved you. Just a little more. Good boy." It's the kind of things she's always saying, these nights, but for some reason tonight it rings a little false. She always loved him? Then why did she tell Mr. Nostrum to cut his throat?

He feels like he's half waking up; the magic around him seems weaker than usual, like it's not muffling him as much as it normally does. It feels less like dreaming, but if he's waking up... well, what is he doing here, with Gwendolen? She's his sister. And what's she doing with his magic?

Feeling a little disturbed, he starts following the thread of his magic, off to see what she's doing with it, and it's then that he sees the weapons. The ones that have been going missing from Ten, the ones that keep showing up in wars of aggression through all the Related Worlds. Gwendolen's been the one doing that? Fooling everyone?

She's still caressing him while she puts his magic into the weapons, enchanting them, and how did he not notice this was going on? He has to stop this, and so he does the only thing he can think to do, still all wrapped up in his own, now thinned-out magic. She must have overused it, to make it so pale and weak. "Chrestomanci," he says.

Gwendolen jumps, her body twitching next to him. "Cat!" she says, and tries to clap her hand over his mouth.

"Chrestomanci," he says again, wiggling away from Gwendolen, trying to pull his magic away from her.

"Stop it, Cat!" she says, almost in a shriek. With her face all twisted up like that, he can't think how he ever thought she was beautiful. "Stop that at once!"

"Chrestomanci," he says a third time, louder now, and then Chrestomanci's standing in the doorway in his pajamas, hair mussed up like he had been in bed when Cat summoned him. He blinks a few times, waking up, taking in the scene in front of him. Cat and Gwendolen in bed together, Cat not wearing anything but his own magic wrapped around him.

As Chrestomanci stands there staring, Cat sees all the blood drain from his face, leaving him looking old and gray.

**

It didn't take long for Chrestomanci to subdue Gwendolen, with Cat's help. She's screaming horrible things about Cat, that she wishes he were dead, that Cat's always been weak, that he's supposed to do whatever she says. Chrestomanci finally makes her stop, but not before she's said things Cat won't forget, that make him want to shrink in on himself until he disappears. He can't believe he didn't know what she was doing. He can't believe he believed her when she said she loved him.

She's under arrest, and so are a lot of other people from her world who were working with her. It takes the Family some time to round them all up, bring them back to the castle. Just after Michael Saunders has taken Gwendolen away, leaving Cat and Chrestomanci the only two left, Chrestomanci finally really looks at Cat, for the first time since Cat summoned him. He looks very vague indeed.

"I think you had better be under arrest as well, Eric," Chrestomanci says, sounding very subdued. "At least until we get this all straightened out."

"Oh," Cat says. The click of the steel handcuffs sounds very loud in the empty room and Cat hunches his shoulders, feeling sick.

**

Cat thought things would be straightened out quickly, but they aren't. He stays in jail for weeks, and then there's a trial for him as well as Gwendolen and the real criminals. It's his magic that was powering the whole operation, whether Cat knew it or not. Sometimes Cat thinks that nobody believes he didn't know what he was doing, not even Chrestomanci.

Chrestomanci is his defense, arguing eloquently for his innocence in front of the courtroom, resplendent in black suits and silk ties. But he doesn't meet Cat's eyes in court, and he never comes to visit him. He looks very tired all the time, dark circles under his eyes, and Cat would rather sit in court noticing that than notice how the jury looks at him with fear and pity.

Millie comes to see Cat sometimes, always looking worried under the forced cheer she puts on for him. She asks him how he is, and brings him things to read, and avoids answering most of his questions. Cat's sure Gwendolen was found guilty, but Millie won't tell him if she's going to be executed or not. He doesn't know whether he hopes she is or she isn't.

On one Sunday Millie visits, Cat gets up the courage to say, "Is Chrestomanci very angry with me?"

Millie looks pained. "Oh, Eric," she says, and hesitates. So he is, then. "He just... got a bit of a shock," Millie says finally.

**

Millie must tell Chrestomanci that he ought to come visit Cat, because the next week at visiting hours, Chrestomanci appears, looking tall and somber and even more well-dressed than usual, the gray of the prison all around him making the colors of his tie stand out sharply.

"Oh," Cat says, feeling his insides shrink up. "Hello."

"Hello, Eric," Chrestomanci says, sitting gingerly across from him, as though he's concerned for his trousers.

There is a long miserable silence. Cat fidgets, not knowing what to say to him, and Chrestomanci seems at a loss himself. Finally he seems to decide that talking to Cat about court is the way to go, and he says, "Well, I think the trial's going as well as can be expected."

Cat clears his throat. "Is it?"

"Yes," Chrestomanci says, adjusting one of his shirt cuffs, trying not to look at Cat. "I'd say it's possible you might not be convicted."

Somehow Cat had been under the impression, without anyone saying anything to that effect, that he was quite likely to get off. After all, he didn't mean to do any of it -- surely that must count for something? So hearing Chrestomanci say this as though it's surprising Cat might not be found guilty, well. It's a bit of a blow. "Possible?" Cat says, his voice a little strangled.

Chrestomanci turns those piercing black eyes on him with that steady neutral look that's somehow so shaming. "You were an arms supplier for half the Related Worlds, Eric," Chrestomanci says coolly. "You really thought there wouldn't be any consequences?"

Cat wants to disappear. Even after all these years he doesn't understand how Chrestomanci can be so terrifying without raising his voice. "But... but I didn't mean to," he says. "I didn't know I was doing it. I think she bewitched me."

Chrestomanci looks at him. "And you an enchanter?" he says, one eyebrow raised delicately. He's still calm and neutral on the surface, but Cat can see that underneath, he is angrier than Cat's ever seen him, holding it back with some difficulty. It's all Cat can do not to wince away.

"I know," Cat says, staring down at the table, feeling hot all over. He doesn't know why everyone thinks he did it on purpose, like he's someone awful. Cat's nice, really. He doesn't know why they can't see that. "But I didn't mean to. I just... I was... it's just that I missed Gwendolen. She's the only person I had."

It's just a statement of fact, not meant as a criticism. But Chrestomanci blinks twice, almost as though Cat's slapped him, and his shoulders hunch slightly. Cat suddenly notices the gray at his temples, wonders when that happened. "You have us," Chrestomanci says after a moment. But he looks a bit... vulnerable, like Cat's reminded him of something he's been trying not to think about. Suddenly Cat wonders, as he's never thought to wonder before, if the government's investigating Chrestomanci as well, since Cat's his ward and successor.

"Oh, I know," Cat says fast, trying to reassure him. He didn't mean to make him feel badly, if that's what Chrestomanci's feeling. It's unsettling, seeing Chrestomanci look like that. "I didn't mean... I just meant, my only family." Chrestomanci doesn't look like he feels any better, though, and Cat remembers, too late, that Chrestomanci is some kind of cousin of his.

It's just, it's not the same. They're not _real_ family. Not the way Gwendolen was. Chrestomanci must see that.

Chrestomanci's anger seems to have dissipated, though, and the anger was bad, but this strange, tired Chrestomanci is worse. Cat wonders how he's managing to do any of his work, looking that exhausted. Which reminds him of something he's been meaning to ask.

"If I'm convicted," Cat says. "Who will be Chrestomanci after you?" There aren't any other nine-lived enchanters that they know of, and with Chrestomanci looking so old, it's hard to know how much longer he can keep doing the job by himself.

At the question, Chrestomanci looks even older than before, and he pinches the bridge of his nose between finger and thumb for a moment. "I don't know," he says. He begins to get up to leave, brushing imaginary dust from the sleeve of his suit jacket. The concern for his clothes should be reassuring, like he's back to being himself, but it comes off weak and sad, more like Chrestomanci's trying to convince himself that he's fine than anything. "I should be getting back," Chrestomanci says. He's stopped looking at Cat again, like it's painful to see him.

"All right," Cat says.

He doesn't think Chrestomanci's going to say any more, but as the guard comes to escort him out, Chrestomanci says in a very low voice, without turning around, "I'm sorry, Cat."

**

That night, lying in his cell, Cat stretches out the string figures of his magic to try to see if he can find Gwendolen, see if that cord still stretches between them. It's a bit tricky to find a way through all the spells holding him in, but he finally finds a space at one corner and slides out through it, looking. But he can't find her.

**

The whole Family comes to hear Cat's verdict being read. It's the first time he's seen most of them since the arrest, and it's strange to see Julia and Roger and Janet all in their best clothes, looking pale and worried. He tries to smile at them, especially Janet, and they smile back, but weakly. Millie's got her arm around Janet like it's hitting her the hardest, even though she's not really Cat's sister.

Cat had been holding onto the hope that he would be found not guilty and would just be able to go home, to have everything go back to the way it was. But seeing them now, somehow he knows that things are never going to go back. They're all looking at him like they've never really seen him before.

The jury isn't sequestered for very long before everyone's called back in. Cat doesn't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Chrestomanci's sitting next to him, holding very still.

"Has the jury reached a verdict?" the judge asks, and the foreman stands up.

"We have, Your Honor."

Cat and Chrestomanci stand to hear it.


End file.
